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Premium Member
1,189 Posts
The day after a long weekend.

The airport approach path is full with inbound flights.
View attachment 352026

The drive down to pickups for my rematch is ludicrous - I can only imagine how heinous it was if you drove in from the Pig Pen.

And there you were.

In you off white pale cream eggshell Camry, with your sunburnt elbow poking out the drivers window as though you were the new Marlboro Man.

"Come to Marlboro Country in my Rideshare."

Seeing the two open spaces in front of you, I politely pulled in behind you and waited - didn't want to be rude. And waited. You weren't moving forward? I leaned out my open window and looked forward - nope, there was no obstructions.


Courtesy beep- maybe you had driven through the night and now that it was daylight hours, you were looking for your shades. An apology with the beep - sorry to have ask you to look up.

You didn't move. I waited, but you didn't move.

...5 Mississippi's, 6 Mississippi's...

Honk honk.

Hey buddy - move along, there plenty of room and half the State of California needs a ride this morning.

You didn't move. I waited, but you didn't move.

...3 Mississippi's, 4 Mississippi's....


I peeled out, drove around you, laying on the horn until I got beside and stopped by your window.

You didn't move. You didn't even flinch. You cretinous moron. I pulled in front of you and still had room for another driver to pull in behind me.

I wasn't laying on the horn for you, I was laying on the horn to draw the attention of the Harbor Police working traffic this morning.

I don't know why he asked you to step out of your vehicle. Perhaps it was because:
  • No trade dress.
  • Park across center line.
  • Stand obstructing pedestrian crossing.
  • Have expired tags (May 19) displayed.

By the time I had loaded up you were waving your arms at the Harbor Police Officer as though you were air traffic control. I can only imagine what your defense was.

"But Officer, I'm a cretinous moron."

I don't know how much the yellow colored paper that LEO handed you cost. Maybe $200?

That seems to a high price to pay for being a cretinous moron, but in your case, I'd say it was appropriate.

Learn to park in Marlboro Country, then come back and GFY.
Revenge is a dish that is best served when hot as well as chilled.
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