I've had enough.
Finally, many of you may scream. I scream it as well, finally.
After being deactivated (not entirely sure why, I thought it was due to inactivity in December), I was re-instated after spending 5 minutes in Subiaco. Could never get the actual answer. However yet again, as many of us fall victim of, the game that is Uber is absorbing me away from things that matter i.e Fishing, watching the cricket, playing backyard cricket, working on my car, doing paperwork, studying and general downtime. The truth is - whilst many of you whom I deeply pity, so uber as some type of endgame or work. It is not. My offer still remains. Anybody who has had enough - is free to message me and I will find you proper employment, in the click of my finger.
Uber is nothing more than something to do to kill time, for pleasure and recreation, a hobby or the way I see it; a game. I have never cared about the negative vibes I have sent and the poor reflection other drivers receive due to my blissful idiocy, I have fun doing it. I made it profitable, I got a laugh out of it and saw the optimistic side - so many of you ignored. However it must come to an end. AFL season is about to begin, this year I'm playing country footy for Lancelin which pretty much writes off my weekends. I cannot afford to fiddle on Friday evenings, try to force another $20 on a Saturday morning or waste my recovery and study time on a Sunday.
Between now and my birthday on April 19 - I am going to be the biggest serial pest possible. If Uber deactivates me prior to that - so be it. My rating has gradually improved in the last week to a brilliant 5.57, so I'm relatively safe for now. Just two weeks ago we ordered an Uber Black to take us to Breakwater for a wedding reception, the guy took 40 minutes. Plenty of wrong turns, had no idea and claimed it was his own AUDI. Rubbish. I will be doing the same. My goal is to get as near as possible to this date, by bending rules, irritating people and genuine idiocy.
During my time at Uber, I have driven my 2015 Land Cruiser. I drove old Subaru, I've driven a Mazda3, I've driven a Holden Omega (OUCH THAT FUEL!!!), but lately I've been driving a 2005 Honda Civic, I picked it up at bargain price and got an inflated amount on transfer papers. I had to photoshop the rego of course, to bypass Uber's pathetic controls.
My goals between now and April 19:
· 50% revenue in cancellation fares
· Get to 10 negative driving feedback reports. This is due to running an occasional red light, speeding up and slowing down excessively.
· Get to 10 professionalism reports. I currently have 6. I'll be sure to work Sat/Sun mornings for a couple of hours in the next couple of weeks before footy - so when people ask for Water, I will drive to the closest servo and tell them to crab one and get me one. Just to say "you asked for water…".
· Get to 5 cleanliness reports - Currently at 0. I will not be vacuuming my car once. Empty beer bottles? Don't care.
· Accept all jobs no matter what time of day it is. If I'm sitting at work and haven't moved, they'll eventually cancel and be annoyed that I wasted 15 minutes of their time, not so on demand anymore is it? LOL.
· Use the destination filter to be a dick. After being sent to Mindarie when I set it to Armadale from my house in Burns Beach this morning, I was fuming. Who the hell needs to go to Joondalup then do Mindarie, when you live in bloody Iluka!!! The filter is a joke. So I'll be sure to abuse it. That means - as they are often 7+ minutes away due to priority over regulars, I'll rock up and collect a cancellation fee, accept the re-ping and collect another. Only ever twice. Those who are nice and close will be asked to remove shoes, in respect of my religious beliefs.
· I'll be snacking on KFC most afternoon/evening shifts or just plain rubbish. I'll have to go to the gym more, so I don't end up looking like Adele - but it will infuriate riders.
· Radio will be blasting to my favourite black music. Don't like it? Don't care.
· Any surges over 1.8 - are an immediate end to my shift. Example: surge from Mirrabooka to city at 1.8. I'll be driving home after I drop PAX off. They can pay, if Uber disputes - I'll dispute back or blame the app.
· Collect 5 $40 cleaning fees against PAX that annoyed me.
· Boot any pax who tries talking down on me out of my car (minimum kick outs 5x)
· Tell PAX that it is my car, my rules at least 5x
· Finally I'll be checking ID's for anybody who looks under 25. As a proud Uberer, I must enforce their rules of no minors. Everybody must show their ID like in liquor venues. Failure to provide, is an instant cancel $6.40 and a laugh for me.
I will post pictures along the way of feedback and will try get some recordings for everyone to have a giggle at.
Welcome to Tom's road to deactivation.
It has been fun Uber, now you are about to be even more fun.
LOL.
Finally, many of you may scream. I scream it as well, finally.
After being deactivated (not entirely sure why, I thought it was due to inactivity in December), I was re-instated after spending 5 minutes in Subiaco. Could never get the actual answer. However yet again, as many of us fall victim of, the game that is Uber is absorbing me away from things that matter i.e Fishing, watching the cricket, playing backyard cricket, working on my car, doing paperwork, studying and general downtime. The truth is - whilst many of you whom I deeply pity, so uber as some type of endgame or work. It is not. My offer still remains. Anybody who has had enough - is free to message me and I will find you proper employment, in the click of my finger.
Uber is nothing more than something to do to kill time, for pleasure and recreation, a hobby or the way I see it; a game. I have never cared about the negative vibes I have sent and the poor reflection other drivers receive due to my blissful idiocy, I have fun doing it. I made it profitable, I got a laugh out of it and saw the optimistic side - so many of you ignored. However it must come to an end. AFL season is about to begin, this year I'm playing country footy for Lancelin which pretty much writes off my weekends. I cannot afford to fiddle on Friday evenings, try to force another $20 on a Saturday morning or waste my recovery and study time on a Sunday.
Between now and my birthday on April 19 - I am going to be the biggest serial pest possible. If Uber deactivates me prior to that - so be it. My rating has gradually improved in the last week to a brilliant 5.57, so I'm relatively safe for now. Just two weeks ago we ordered an Uber Black to take us to Breakwater for a wedding reception, the guy took 40 minutes. Plenty of wrong turns, had no idea and claimed it was his own AUDI. Rubbish. I will be doing the same. My goal is to get as near as possible to this date, by bending rules, irritating people and genuine idiocy.
During my time at Uber, I have driven my 2015 Land Cruiser. I drove old Subaru, I've driven a Mazda3, I've driven a Holden Omega (OUCH THAT FUEL!!!), but lately I've been driving a 2005 Honda Civic, I picked it up at bargain price and got an inflated amount on transfer papers. I had to photoshop the rego of course, to bypass Uber's pathetic controls.
My goals between now and April 19:
· 50% revenue in cancellation fares
· Get to 10 negative driving feedback reports. This is due to running an occasional red light, speeding up and slowing down excessively.
· Get to 10 professionalism reports. I currently have 6. I'll be sure to work Sat/Sun mornings for a couple of hours in the next couple of weeks before footy - so when people ask for Water, I will drive to the closest servo and tell them to crab one and get me one. Just to say "you asked for water…".
· Get to 5 cleanliness reports - Currently at 0. I will not be vacuuming my car once. Empty beer bottles? Don't care.
· Accept all jobs no matter what time of day it is. If I'm sitting at work and haven't moved, they'll eventually cancel and be annoyed that I wasted 15 minutes of their time, not so on demand anymore is it? LOL.
· Use the destination filter to be a dick. After being sent to Mindarie when I set it to Armadale from my house in Burns Beach this morning, I was fuming. Who the hell needs to go to Joondalup then do Mindarie, when you live in bloody Iluka!!! The filter is a joke. So I'll be sure to abuse it. That means - as they are often 7+ minutes away due to priority over regulars, I'll rock up and collect a cancellation fee, accept the re-ping and collect another. Only ever twice. Those who are nice and close will be asked to remove shoes, in respect of my religious beliefs.
· I'll be snacking on KFC most afternoon/evening shifts or just plain rubbish. I'll have to go to the gym more, so I don't end up looking like Adele - but it will infuriate riders.
· Radio will be blasting to my favourite black music. Don't like it? Don't care.
· Any surges over 1.8 - are an immediate end to my shift. Example: surge from Mirrabooka to city at 1.8. I'll be driving home after I drop PAX off. They can pay, if Uber disputes - I'll dispute back or blame the app.
· Collect 5 $40 cleaning fees against PAX that annoyed me.
· Boot any pax who tries talking down on me out of my car (minimum kick outs 5x)
· Tell PAX that it is my car, my rules at least 5x
· Finally I'll be checking ID's for anybody who looks under 25. As a proud Uberer, I must enforce their rules of no minors. Everybody must show their ID like in liquor venues. Failure to provide, is an instant cancel $6.40 and a laugh for me.
I will post pictures along the way of feedback and will try get some recordings for everyone to have a giggle at.
Welcome to Tom's road to deactivation.
It has been fun Uber, now you are about to be even more fun.
LOL.
