[FatTim]

Has anyone else almost shit their pants while trying to get your passenger to their destination? Or even let so much gas build up while holding in a fart that you have to let a little out while trying not to make too much noise?

 

[Surge Knight]

Never hold them in.That is the main cause of male Baldness. The gas rises up to your head if you don't pass, and presses on the hair follicles, eventual forcing them out. I am almost completely bald from holding them in!

 

[Uberbuddy123]

I urge this to be a sticky post-

 

[LubyrDude]

Never hold them in.That is the main cause of male Baldness. The gas rises up to your head if you don't pass, and presses on the hair follicles, eventual forcing them out. I am almost completely bald from holding them in!

I am well trained in both SBD & LAH gas-passing so as to never 'hold one' & have hair! Point proven.

 

[Slyster]

On the bright side, it does cause more back hair.

 

[Kaal]

No.

 

[Tdizzle22]

Never hold them in.That is the main cause of male Baldness. The gas rises up to your head if you don't pass, and presses on the hair follicles, eventual forcing them out. I am almost completely bald from holding them in!

that...that might actually explain a lot lol

 

[Mpls55345]

I imagine making it to a bathroom while Ubering is no different than any other job or part of our day. As long as you can make it past the urine lake in the mens bathroom at post road SA.

 

[Dom Draper]

Never go to post road. You’ll be waiting in line 30 minutes while the cabbies in front of you bathe themselves in the sink before praying.

 

[rallias]

That is the main cause of male Baldness.

This is false. The main cause of male baldness is testosterone. Hold your boat 'til you can toot your flute if you like.

 

[SurgeMasterMN]

Has anyone else almost shit their pants while trying to get your passenger to their destination? Or even let so much gas build up while holding in a fart that you have to let a little out while trying not to make too much noise?

Happened once when my wife and I were heading back from the casino. I was the designated driver and slammed 3 lemonades and a Mountain Dew in a few hours. I hadn't drank sugary drinks in a while and it felt like a rock in my stomach after that. On the way back home had to run into the Gas Station ( well kinda waddle) That dang belt took too long to get off half in half out. The toliet looked like a poop murder scene.

 

[68350]

TMI...

Log off, make a pit stop. Geez.

 

[Mikejay]

Happened once when my wife and I were heading back from the casino. I was the designated driver and slammed 3 lemonades and a Mountain Dew in a few hours. I hadn't drank sugary drinks in a while and it felt like a rock in my stomach after that. On the way back home had to run into the Gas Station ( well kinda waddle) That dang belt took too long to get off half in half out. The toliet looked like a poop murder scene.

sweet baby jesus. that is unfortunate but hilarious.

 

[SurgeMasterMN]

sweet baby jesus. that is unfortunate but hilarious.

???

I should have taken a photo I couldn't believe what happened. It was distressing and funny at the same time. I did my best to clean it up.

Moral of the story if u are not use to drinking pop or artificial lemonade from the fountains don't pound to many to quick and jump on a 15 mile car ride.

 

[Mikejay]

As my brother would say at least you got some fip. (free Indian pop)

 

[SurgeMasterMN]

As my brother would say at least you got some fip. (free Indian pop)

The good thing is I faired alright at the casino the bad luck was the drive home...

I guess I crapped out ....

 

[Surge Knight]

This is false. The main cause of male baldness is testosterone. Hold your boat 'til you can toot your flute if you like.

Well, it also can cause blindness and deafness, because if you're already bald, then the gas will press either on your eyeballs or ear canals depending on which is lower. In Wisconsin I am told, it can come out of peoples noses.

 

[UbeRoBo]

In all seriousness, not peeing when you have to is a real threat. They did a study many years ago trying to figure out why there is a high occurrence of kidney stones amongst airline pilots and truck drivers. Testing found that holding excessive urine in the bladder can significantly increases the development of kidney stones. If you have to pee then stop and pee.

 

[Mikejay]

In all seriousness, not peeing when you have to is a real threat. They did a study many years ago trying to figure out why there is a high occurrence of kidney stones amongst airline pilots and truck drivers. Testing found that holding excessive urine in the bladder can significantly increases the development of kidney stones. If you have to pee then stop and pee.

Excuse me guys.... (Can be heard screaming while running into bathroom).

 

[Dom Draper]

I once saw a Lyft driver shit himself in a Kwik trip in Burnsville. Older guy, probably early 60’s, gets out of his car doing the dookie waddle and walks right past me as I notice little brown turdlets falling out of the bottom of his pant legs leaving a trail of doo-doo pellets from the front door all the way to the John.

The girl stocking the shelves who also noticed it looks at me and says,” I’m not cleaning that. I don’t get paid enough for that.”

I wouldn’t either. I’d quit first.