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418 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So, the day had already gone to the shiznit when the previous HG block was blown by 4 trips to Daly City in a row (Thanks Uber!)... so at 4pm I took a break to get ready for the 5pm evening HG block (aiming for at least 5 hours)...

At 5pm, I get a Pax pool request (5.0 stars) in Sunset District (a block from the beach) when this white dude (clean shaven, looked like a tech bro) is standing there, in his boxers, no shirt, no shoes, a backpack, and he climbs in hella fast.. I checked the destination. A Pool going to the Marriott in FiDi, dude looks fidgety. Let's call him CokePax.

Ooookay, then:

- Coke Pax says he's from NYC
- Asks why it took 3 Uber cancels before he was picked up (b/c other drivers were smarter than me!)
- Laughs maniacally
- He says this was an impulse trip, he decided Yesterday to come to SF (probably after a couple of coke lines)
- 1st time ever in SF, day 2, going back tomorrow
- Laughs maniacally
- He says he 'had' to touch the Pacific Ocean, wasn't expecting to be 'so cold'
- Laughs maniacally
- Then he mentions the 'homeless' in SF on 'heroin' a couple of times. Around his hotel...
- Pool request comes in (No way to warn them...I won't die alone I think)
- 2nd Pool Pax (a couple) comes in
- Coke Pax asks where are they from...3 separate times, they reply.
- Laughs maniacally
- Couple is very patient with the situation. They try to talk to each other for a while, ignoring CokePax
- Coke Pax asks couple where did they met?, couple responds, online
- Coke Pax blurts : Oh yeah. Like Tinder? I can't do that anymore, Judge told me. I'm on probation (Yikes!)
- Laughs maniacally
- Coke Pax blurts: You guys like weed? I don't, I ran 2 marathons this year (I'm thinking a blunt would chill this guy right f'ing now)
- Coke Pax blurts: But is OK, my officer calls me, but doesn't visit me like on my first time (Yikes - 2nd probation here)
- Couple Pax mention that his mom sometimes uses weed
- Coke Pax responds: I did so many drugs last week, but not weed!...this week I feel OK.
- Laughs maniacally
- Couple Pax stop finally arrives, they leave, they look at me with pity and horror
- I make political chat to survive the alone time (at least CokePax is pro Hillary!)
--Laughs maniacally
- Drop Coke Pax at Marriott, when I drop him, the doorman rolls his eyes... and lets him into the hotel - still in boxers, still shirtless and shoeless - CokePax did indeed check at the Marriott. Who knew

Kids, don't be dumb like me. Don't pick up crackheads in boxers, even if they look like tech bros. At least it helped made HG block from 5pm to 10pm

995 Posts
That's not dumb....

Dumb is when you're exchanging numbers with an Asian girl 1/2 your age and you're not quite making out, but exchanging breaths with her titty pressed up against you...

And when you're hugging she looks down and you have a boner...

Boner in sweatpants......

Normally I'm joking.... not this time....

How the f does it get worse than that?

That is dumb....

I don't think she'll be calling....
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