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(Not suitable for work.) It involved 5 U of M ladies wearing less fabric than one modest dress...combined. I kissed me on the lips, another took a selfie video of her, me, and another lady. Dropped them off at Sally's, of course. Halfway through the ride, one them yells, "I need a ____ up my _____ tonight."

Even the other inebriated ladies were surprised that she said it out loud.
 

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(Not suitable for work.) It involved 5 U of M ladies wearing less fabric than one modest dress...combined. I kissed me on the lips, another took a selfie video of her, me, and another lady. Dropped them off at Sally's, of course. Halfway through the ride, one them yells, "I need a ____ up my _____ tonight."

Even the other inebriated ladies were surprised that she said it out loud.
For crying out loud man. You know poopyhead is going to ask if they were hot so just tell us already. :)
 

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Three were smoking, one was acceptable, one was not. The one who made the comment was the acceptable one. The one who kissed me was hot but not the hottest.
 

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Went to a house above Saint Paul and when I was 4/10 of a mile away the guy called me and said as you can see there is caution tape and some cops you need to turn here then here and my wife will be on the corner of this street. The wife gets in and let's me know their neighbor had shot his GF and had a shoot out with police and got killed body was laying in a yard. It was pretty crazy!!
 

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When I was a cab driver in Las Vegas I picked up 3 fat chick's drunk as hell who wanted to go like 6 blocks.I was pulling up into there hotel and hit some speed bumps and the next thing I know the chick in the back seat puked into her huge ****,then the girl next to her saw that and got sick and puked into her own **** (hold on there's more)then the chick in the front seat puked into a cup. 3 puking girls all like in there 30ds
 

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Picked up a female rider and she told me the last guy she hooked up with stuck his finger up her butt. (She was hot.) Drunk college girls have no filter.
 

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Picked up 3 guys, army buddies, two were pretty drunk. A was in the front seat, B was behind him and C behind the driver seat. A and B have an argument and I have to yell at them to shut up or I will drop them in the middle of the freeway. We get to University and 694 and as I am turning off the ramp onto University, A opens his door and takes off the seat belt. I hit the brakes and stop just under the bridge of 694. A is out and opening the back door. Grabs B by the shirt and pulls him out and starts to punch him. B defends himself and KOs A who falls into standing water that is on the side of the road.

I have called 911, and other cars have pulled over. B lives about 1/2 mile from where we are, so he walks home just before cops arrive. Cops take my statement and C's statement and A goes in an ambulance.

C is a good guy and not drunk, but is smaller than his buddies and there was nothing we could do to stop the fight. C was holding money from the other guys and while apologizing for the fight and lost revenue, gives me the money he is holding, claiming it is not much, but the least he can do. Turns out it was $68. He didn't care, said it served them right for fighting.
 

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Picked up a kid from Station 280 Thursday night. He walks towards the car then goes back towards the door and plants a kiss on some girl. Gets in the car talking to himself and was all over the place. Hands me a $20 and says just get me home and fast. Tries to give me directions over and over taking under his breathe. Didn't let it get to me because it reminded me of being a drunk college kid with the spins :). He apologized a lot then gets out of the car and hands me 2 more dollar bills. So yeah $22 plus the Uber money ($7) worked for me. Pretty convinced the kid didn't remember the $20.
 
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